Re: Modern football

And assists can fuck off too.

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Re: Modern football

An assist is as good as a goal

Don Revie

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Re: Modern football

Misura wrote:

11. Handshakes. Funny handshakes are for pre-pubescant children, or characters in 70's blaxploitation films, not fully functioning self aware adults. If you're still practicing them or devising new ones over the age of 11 (and you are not a member of a secret society or order) there is something wrong with you. If you delight in using them and post it on social media, then there is something seriously wrong with you.

Swansea currently 2nd from bottom, and they're doing this. Their collective time would be better spent learning how to defend set pieces. Or attacking set pieces. In fact anything relating to extricating themselves from the mire they are currently in.

Last edited by Misura (Tue 21 Nov 2017 5:02 pm)

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Re: Modern football

12. Keepers arsing about. I hate it when they fall to the floor and i hate it when then they hold onto the ball or delay a kick whilst pointing to some imaginary player in the distance, instructing him to move in/out/forwards/backwards. Also when they do that thing when a shot goes wide and they rush out of their area to berrate someone. Or when the ball goes out one side of the net and they move it to the other to take the kick. Take. The. Fucking. Goal. Kick.

13. When the clock is ticking down, and the ball goes out of play for a thrown in and the player asks the ref/points to the floor to make sure that it is the correct place for the throw. They've spent 80 fucking minutes taking all mannner of set pieces from wherever on the pitch they fucking feel like it, but now, with a couple of minutes left it is suddenly the most important thing in their world that, that they are in the correct spot to the nearest centimetre. And then he drops the ball and leaves it for a team mate to take. mad

Last edited by Misura (Tue 21 Nov 2017 5:09 pm)

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Re: Modern football

And refs telling players he's going to drop the ball and the player must return it to the opposition. Fuck that, contest it.

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I was watching rio ave v braga in the portugese FA Cup on saturday night and a player got subbed in the 90th minute and then embarked on a farewell tour when leaving the pitch, shaking the hands of team mates, shaking the hand of the ref, rolling his socks down, taking off his shin pads, applauding the crowd, etc. He was on a yellow and the ref gave him another one. I fucking loved it. Made my night. I went to bed with a smile on my face. That'll learn 'em.

I hope you went out smiling like a child, into the cool remnant of a dream.

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Re: Modern football

I'd like to see more bookings for simulation.  Go down like a snipers bullet has hit you and then spring back into life?  Have a fucking card you cheating cunt.

And make players bookable for cheating after the game.  If the ref reviews a decision by video after the game and sees that someone has conned him for a decision then he should be able to give them a card.    And send them by post.  It'll drop on the mat of the player concerned the next day and fuck his day up.

Leeds United:  Boiling Barnsley's piss since 2018.

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Re: Modern football

Misura wrote:

I was watching rio ave v braga in the portugese FA Cup on saturday night and a player got subbed in the 90th minute and then embarked on a farewell tour when leaving the pitch, shaking the hands of team mates, shaking the hand of the ref, rolling his socks down, taking off his shin pads, applauding the crowd, etc. He was on a yellow and the ref gave him another one. I fucking loved it. Made my night. I went to bed with a smile on my face. That'll learn 'em.

THAT is what I mean. Rules is rules.

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Opposing team members of same nationality hugging in the tunnel.

Fuck off - THIS IS WAR.

Or at least let us think that it is, and leave all that stuff for the nightclub later.

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Re: Modern football

Harvest wrote:
Misura wrote:

I was watching rio ave v braga in the portugese FA Cup on saturday night and a player got subbed in the 90th minute and then embarked on a farewell tour when leaving the pitch, shaking the hands of team mates, shaking the hand of the ref, rolling his socks down, taking off his shin pads, applauding the crowd, etc. He was on a yellow and the ref gave him another one. I fucking loved it. Made my night. I went to bed with a smile on my face. That'll learn 'em.

THAT is what I mean. Rules is rules.

Possibly some of the greatest football related posts on OMJ but as someone always used to shout at me 'Its Laws , Laws of Football'

Over here in the Central Lancs Junior Football league 12s, players laying on the floor with one arm raised to signal an injury is an increasing problem as are Fascist salutes at corners which do not appear to be correctly interpretated by team mates.

I want to see bookings for players who fail to beat the first defender at a corner as well.

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Re: Modern football

The fucking ball barely in the corner area fing.

Fucking notrights.

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Learned commentators teaching me fuckall, aside from who they support.

Neutral? Neutral? He's a biased cunt and you know he is.

I'd prefer it if he was a biased cunt. And then I'd know where I was.

Last edited by Expanding Man (Tue 21 Nov 2017 8:15 pm)

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Re: Modern football

Liverpool was supposedly 'lively' last night. Atalanta/Eintracht Frankfurt v. the rest.

Last edited by Misura (Thu 23 Nov 2017 2:49 pm)

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Re: Modern football

The run that is slower than walking pace to get off the pitch when late subs being made. 

References to simulation instead of cheating. 

All use of the word "group" in reference to players.

Handball not being "deliberate".  NO PENALTY.

Full on wrestling and pushing at corners, WTF?  PENTALTY.

I'd offer you a beer, but I've only got six cans.

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Re: Modern football

Coloured boots

You are what you repeatedly do. Excellence is not an event - it is a habit.

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Re: Modern football

I've noticed black boots seem to be re-emerging a bit.

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Harvest wrote:

I've noticed black boots seem to be re-emerging a bit.

Not on telly - you've been watching too much Leeds H

You are what you repeatedly do. Excellence is not an event - it is a habit.

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My TV's black and white. Maybe that's why.

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It's boot sponsorship innit. Why else would anyone in their right mind wear something that looks like it's made out of carrier bags, and offers little/no protection to the foot unless they are getting paid handsomely?

Proper boots?

http://www.pantofoladoro.com/football/

http://www.akuna.it/en/

https://ryalshop.com/collection/

http://danesecalzature.it/en/product-category/calcio/

http://inbedwithmaradona.com/gear/2013/ … kus-stolla

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Re: Modern football

Misura wrote:

It's boot sponsorship innit. Why else would anyone in their right mind wear something that looks like it's made out of carrier bags, and offers little/no protection to the foot unless they are getting paid handsomely?

Proper boots?

http://www.pantofoladoro.com/football/

http://www.akuna.it/en/

https://ryalshop.com/collection/

http://danesecalzature.it/en/product-category/calcio/

http://inbedwithmaradona.com/gear/2013/ … kus-stolla

Some good ones there

Akuna is shit though - what the hell is a 'Soccer Shoe'????

You are what you repeatedly do. Excellence is not an event - it is a habit.

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Re: Modern football

Terry Cooper's White Style Matchmakers are still where it's at.

I'd offer you a beer, but I've only got six cans.

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Re: Modern football

Arsenal.

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Re: Modern football

Misura wrote:

Arsenal.


Bless you.


https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/74/d7/99/74d79916ce6e16e8b2fd8976f5259b57--gold-curtains-morecambe.jpg

Leeds United:  Boiling Barnsley's piss since 2018.

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Re: Modern football

Top tip for players that pull the top of their socks up over their knees.

The milk-maid look is not a good one for grown men.

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Re: Modern football

Marouane Fellaini is currently negotiating a new £170k a week contract.

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