fulmine
I suspect this has more to do with all the cheese I was eating yesterday, but I had this bloody weird dream last night. Ken Bates was giving this lecture and all these Leeds fans were throwing cans of baked beans at him. Enya got up and started singing and calmed everyone down. Why I would be dreaming about Ken Bates and Leeds the lord alone knows (Enya often pops up in my dreams, the filthy whore), but it all seemed very OMJ to me. Sorry, internet access is shite where I am at the moment (my neighbour reckons it's because of the hills), so might have to dash in a minute. Been here (Florence) nearly three weeks now, still can't quite get out of holiday mode. Is the Amanda Knox/Perugia case getting much coverage over there? She's bonkers. Was in a bar the other night watching the football and this shit-faced Yank came up to me and started getting all flirty, looked just like the Knox girl. You go into any of these Irish-themed pubs and they're full of bladdered Americans.
Loose_Lips
I take it back about traveling and having adventures in foreign lands. I would require constant access to an internet link. You're a brave man, Fulmine. Keep us posted on pissed Americans in Irish bars fella.
kaydubya
Fell asleep on my settee waiting for MOTD on Saturday night after all day on the piss.Woke up at 5am, got up to go for a piss on my way to bed. Out of the lounge into the hall. It was pitch black. Heard a noise from inside the bathroom, opened the door and someone pushed past me in the darkness and ran to the front door. Shit myself! Then I woke up.Went out of the lounge, into the hall, it was pitch black...Thought fuck it, I'll have a piss in the morning. :/
Rudi
Are you still lodging with Fred and Rose? :o
kaydubya
:lol:I will be this week for the final week.This was Saturday at home on me own. Made me think of those night terror things you mentioned before Could feel the thing barge past me. :o:o:o
Rudi
kaydubya wrote:lol:I will be this week for the final week.This was Saturday at home on me own. Made me think of those night terror things you mentioned before Could feel the thing barge past me. :o:o:o
If you'd have had a visit from the night hag you'd have known about it I can promise you. It won't have barged past you, it'd have jumped on your chest and breathed it's hot fetid breath in your face. You'd have been seeking the advice of a priest. :oI wonder what Rose and Fred have got planned for your final week? Surely this will be the moment Fred uncorks the bottle of Lambrusco, turns the key in the front door and casually drops it down Rose's crimplene strides?
Sir_Gaylord_Retardo
I dreamed last night that I was staying in a hotel and needed to go to lay some logs. However, there was no toilet in there. In the centre of the bed was a hole (which had previously been used) I decided not to use it as it was full up. Was glad when I woke up. God knows what sort of state I'd have been in if I'd "followed through" with it.
Harvest
About 10 years ago I ended up undergoing a load of hypnotherapy sessions. Part of it was to keep a dream diary and the bloke would try and interpret them every week. I really got into it and got loads of books about dreams and started with lucid dreaming where you can tell yourself in your dream that your dreaming and you can do all sorts. Shagging famous people never seemed to work though. Or else it would for a bit and then Sharleen Spiteri would suddenly morph into Patrick Moore at the point of no return.I dream every night and always remember them. I've done all that night terror thing. Used to wake up screaming night after night when I was little. Sleepwalking, the lot. If I've spent too long on OMJ I dream about OMJers - I've never met a fellow one ever to my knowledge. Some of you get up to all sorts.
Rudi
Had a really mental dream last night. I was going up this steep bank of steps into this football stadium, two minutes to kick off. Then I heard all this screaming and gunshot. Turned round at the top of these steps, which afforded me a view into the street below. A gang of bankrobbers were piling out of a bank with bags stuffed full of cash, some of it spilling out and blowing across the street. All the gang were dressed in these suits made out of newspapers. They were firing into the crowd, people keeling over etc etc. Then they all split up and ran in different directions. Two of them came up the steps to where I was, so I started climbing up the side of this stadium, up all the gantry. These two robbers were hot on my trail. I ended up climbing through a little window in the side of this house where someone was running a bath. One of the good things about not smoking loads of ganj anymore is the vivid dreams every night. Better than owt on telly.
Harvest
Right, with my Freud head on I conclude the following:Steep steps? Finding life a struggle at the moment? Everything seems like hard work and the 2 minutes to k.o indicates leaving everthing till the last second to do which stresses you out. The bank robbers indicate that you're working you're bollocks off and are pissed off that some people get ridiculous sums for seemingly doing fuck all - easy money. The fact they're dressed in newspaper suits points to your profession. They were after you - are you late for submitting a piece to a paper or fear being late. Water in the bath means something, can't remember what.Either that or you have a small cock. Most dreams seem to come round to people wishing they had a bigger knob.
Rudi
Harvest wroteRight, with my Freud head on I conclude the following:Steep steps? Finding life a struggle at the moment? Everything seems like hard work and the 2 minutes to k.o indicates leaving everthing till the last second to do which stresses you out. The bank robbers indicate that you're working you're bollocks off and are pissed off that some people get ridiculous sums for seemingly doing fuck all - easy money. The fact they're dressed in newspaper suits points to your profession. They were after you - are you late for submitting a piece to a paper or fear being late. Water in the bath means something, can't remember what.Either that or you have a small cock. Most dreams seem to come round to people wishing they had a bigger knob.
Absolute poppycock. I'm currently unemployed and hung like a donkey. :o :/
Blue_Lou_Boyle
Rudi wroteAbsolute poppycock. I'm currently unemployed and hung like a donkey. :o :/
you wanna watch that in Hull. Don't they fuck donkeys in fields out there?
Rudi
Blue Lou Boyle wroteRudi wroteAbsolute poppycock. I'm currently unemployed and hung like a donkey. :o :/
you wanna watch that in Hull. Don't they fuck donkeys in fields out there?
No they do not. :mad:It's goats. :|In allotments. ;)
Harvest
Fucking hell Rudi, talk about dreams coming true and all that....:o
Rudi
:o:lol:That is ace. Actually, now I come to ponder, my dream may have been inspired by something that was in the local paper a while back when someone got shot near the KC.There were rumours that it was Marlon King, but this was discounted after reports confirmed that the bullet actually hit the target.
WYFSC
Rudi wroteAbsolute poppycock. I'm currently unemployed and hung like a donkey. :o :/
Get Temzzoning!! Our fortune awaits!! I'm going to be the new Zoe Lucker!!
DavidHarveysMonkey
Last night I dreamt I scored the winner in a 3-2 victory for Leeds over Man U. The dream was very vivid. We kicked off in a huge dip in the centre circle - very much like the bomb crater in the playing field by the channel I know - I picked the ball up with a clear run through the middle, the defenders just kept going back and I thought about shooting early but kept on to it two paces more onto the edge of the area and slotted it home to the bottom left hand corner. It felt fucking great. I have a football dream every now and then, they are the best.
Rudi
Last night I dreamt I took a load of 2CB and went wandering around a fairground with a rucksack on my back. I happened upon a gaudy side-show booth which on closer inspection turned out to be a brothel. One of the advertised services was eating a chocolate flake out of one of the lasses minge. I mention this because Gore mentioned flakes on another thread and it brought it all back to me in vivid detail, after completely forgetting all about it. It was weird being on drugs in me dream though, quite vivid. I remember thinking (in me dream) "this is brilliant, I'm gonna be ripped to the tits and there'll be no afters in real life"
CBIT
Whats '2CB' ?
king_of_the_slums
are not built at RBS I can you!